Cat Got Your Tongue
Saturday, November 06, 2004
 
It's getting easier and easier to write for longer and longer lengths of time. At the beginning, I could only channel my energy for a few moments at a time. Now we can continue for a few hours. The ideas are coming to the surface more easily, the passages are getting longer and longer. Sometimes, my master simply cannot write fast enough and loses his concentration, he mixes up some of the details in the fever that our symbiotic relationship raises in him. But the story is taking shape. We are not confused, although we may not be satisfied. I wonder if we will be able to reach the end in one piece. I know you will be there, my weather-beaten reader, but I fear the worst for my master. He is too weak, always catching colds and complaining of stomach pains. He doesn't rest enough and the demands that writing place upon the mind are not to be tampered with lightly.

*


I am quite large and muscular, perhaps bigger than the average cat. You might say of an intimidating size. So large, in fact, that most people never tried to pick me up after seeing me, which is a quite natural thing for a human to do and quite nice for a cat, as well. My hair is short and sleek, and I am all over black except for a patch of white on my left paw, which makes it look like I'm wearing a small sock or bootie. Ryan sometimes called me Puss-n-boot, although I thought it was a silly name. My belly had grown quite a bit since I'd come to stay with my master, although I can't say I'm overly disappointed about being fed well, and swayed from side to side when I trotted through the house or ran along the ground. I considered myself a friendly cat, was unafraid of most people, and I didn't go rushing about at the drop of a hat, as many scaredy-cats have been known to.

I say that I was unafraid of most people. Cat's have a sixth sense, and I refer to all of our extra-sensory abilities as sixth senses but, in reality, there are, perhaps, dozens of them. I have never worried myself with counting them. No one has ever bothered to enumerate them in any orderly fashion, although I would bet that an enterprising human out there is working on it at this very moment, or I might add that I was using my 10th sense or my 8th sense and, after consulting your chart of cat senses or something to that effect, you would have a clear idea about what I was talking about. For the sake of argument, beyond the five sense we share with humans—tasting, touching, seeing, hearing & smelling—all of my additional senses, some of which I have already pointed out, most importantly, my telepathic abilities, fall under the umbrella of a sixth sense. But, as I was saying, I was unafraid of most people. I could tell how kind or otherwise a human was as soon as they entered a room. It's as if you give off some kind of vibe which only animals can sense. I wouldn't be surprised if other animals experienced a similar sensation. Chintzy usually felt the same way about humans as I did, which might be seen as a remarkable coincidence when taken out of context. I have never been wrong about a human, though, and I simply stay away from those of you who give off a bad vibe. It's best for everyone.

*


My master's friend came over every Saturday afternoon to play cribbage and listen to the basketball game. Ryan and Penny had gone to the movie theater with their friends and Linda had dropped them off on her way to get some shopping done. Everyone would be gone for a few hours, which meant that my master had the house to himself. Time he cherished. Time away from the incessant demands of his family who needed his loving attention ad infinitum. And he was always willing to reciprocate, but it just meant time off from being a Father and a husband. The only demands he would be accepting were the demands he placed upon himself.

I was sitting on the windowsill of the large Bay Window near the front door and I watched the man walk up to the door and ring the doorbell. The house was quiet. I watched him on the front porch, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. After a minute, he reached out and rang the doorbell. I turned my head and squinted out the window, looking into the afternoon sun. My master was in the backyard tooling around in his garden so it took him a few moments to answer the door. He came running in and opened the door quickly.

"Hey!"
"Chad."
"Hello, Ray," Chad said, extending his hand. They clasped hands.
"Come in, come in," my master said, pulling Chad into the house.
"How's things?"
"Not too bad." I jumped down off the windowsill and scampered past the two of them, now both standing in the small entrance way.
"Wow, he's a big boy," Chad said. "When did you get a cat? I'm not going to have bad luck am I, now that he's run across my path?" I resented comments like that. Silly old wives' tales. If anything, cats bring good luck. This story should be sufficient proof of that. My master hasn't been especially lucky since my arrival, but neither has he been especially unlucky. In fact, as I assist him in his efforts to write, thereby increasing his stature among the writing
"Linda found him in the kitchen a few nights ago and he's been with us ever since," my master said, laughing a little. "We named him 'Buddy' and, no, you're not going to have bad luck, although you may lose to me again at a game of cribbage." They made their way to the study, where I was waiting, sitting on the windowsill behind my master's desk, pretending to look out the window.
"I don't know, " Chad said, sitting down in a leather chair next to my master's desk. "I feel pretty good today."
"Do you feel like having a drink?"
"If you have any beer, that'd be great."
"You know me," my master said, leaving the room. "The cards are on my desk if you want to start shuffling," he shouted back from the kitchen.

Chad was a friendly. He was nearly bald, but still had a boyish look about him. Nicely dressed, although not expensively. He had the makings of a fine beer-belly, but otherwise looked relatively healthy. He got up from the chair and walked slowly over to where I was sitting at the window.
"Hey, big boy," he said, holding out his hand. I wasn't shy and inched closer with my nose, sniffing at his hand. He had a good, clean smell about him. "How are you, big boy?" I sniffed his hand a few times, he was now sitting next to me on the windowsill, and he started scratching me behind my ears. I started purring. Just then, my master returned, walking into the room with two bottles of beer.
"I see you've made a new friend." He walked around behind his desk, handing one bottle of beer to Chad.
"Yeah, he's a friendly kitty. Thanks," Chad said, grabbing the beer that my master was holding out to him, never taking his other hand off of me.
"Cheers."
"Cheers." They clinked their bottles together and the both took long swigs from the bottle.
"Sit down," my master said, putting his bottle down and opening a drawer at his desk. He took out a pack of cigarettes. "You know the game's already started?"
"It's started already? What time is it?" Chad looked at his watch. "Alright, big boy, time to win some money," Chad confided, leaning closer to me, as if he was telling me a secret.
"It's about 10 minutes after 4," my master answered, lighting a cigarette. "Do you want one?" Chad seated himself in the chair next to my master's desk, picked up the deck of playing cards, and started shuffling.
"Well, yeah. Turn the radio on then and let's see what's happening."

They played a few games, smoked a few cigarettes and drank a few more bottle of beer, the game going on in the background. Really, just background noise to their conversation, which was steady. They were quite good friends, new each other very well, and had a good time together.

"15 for two, 15 for 4, 15 for 6, 15 for 8," my master was pointing at his cards. "9-10-11, 12-13-14, 15-16-17, and 6 is 23, sucker! I'm out and you're skunked. Pay me double." He picked up his beer and finished it off.
"Oof. I hate when I don't get to count." Chad feigned pain, squashing his cigarette in the ashtray and throwing his cards down onto the desk. "Great hand to finish with. You've been getting hands like that all afternoon."
"Must be my lucky day."
"Well, good games. Thanks for the beers. I better get going before your wife and kids get here." Chad stood up.
"Don't worry about it. You know the kids always like seeing you. Are you sure you don't want to stick around for dinner? I think Linda's making her famous lasagne."
"I'd love to, but I've got some things to take care of when I get home. Some calls to make, which reminds me... I've got a friend in town for a few weeks."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, he said he needed some help with one of his current projects. I'm not sure what it's about, but he was looking for another person."
"What kind of project."
"Something very lucrative, but not exactly above board, if you know what I mean."
"Is this the same friend who was visiting you last year?"
"Yeah, he has the same gig about once a year. Are you interested?"
"I'm not sure if I have the time, but, yeah, I'm interested in some extra cash."
"Well, I'll let you know the details next week when we meet."
"Sounds good." They shook hands and walked out of the room. I could still hear them talking.
"Say hello to Linda and the kids, for me." My master unlocked and opened the front door.
"Will do."
"Take it easy, Chad."
"You too."

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